Last year I did one of those chain thingeys on Facebook. Thinking back, I realize that the reason I liked writing it so much was because I was able to share things about myself that I don't normally talk about. It was cathartic and a few months later, I started blogging. I guess this is where it all began...
25 Random Things
Tuesday, February 24, 2009 at 10:32am.
The rules: You're supposed to write 25 random things about yourself and then tag people in your note. If you tag someone it means you want to learn more about them. I think that's pretty much it. I forgot to cut and paste the instructions onto my note, so forgive me if I've missed something.
1. I really wanted to write one of these notes because I love doing quizzes and answering questions about myself. If that's vanity - fine - I prefer to think of it as self exploration. I had to get my little sisters to show me how to write a note on FB though which tells me I'm getting old!
2. I really hate that I started biting my nails again. I stopped right after I turned 20 because I was in a car accident and my bruised face hurt too much to chew. I didn't start biting them again until this summer and I'm disgusted with myself for it.
3. I heard on the Today show last month that there is actually a medical definition for a shopping addiction. I don't pretend to be a shopaholic, I fully am one and it's not something I think will make me cool. I buy stuff and spend money like it's nobody's business. It would blow your mind if you saw me tear through a store. Sometimes after I go shopping I actually feel ill because I wasn't able to exercise any restraint. On the brighter side, I can ALWAYS convince my besties that they "need" to buy that dress or those killer heels. It's a gift :)
4. I think it's weird hearing kids say how hard it was for them when their parents split up. Mine got divorced when I was 6 and I've NEVER thought it was my fault or that they made a bad decision. I always remember thinking my parents had a toxic relationship and I wanted my Dad out of the house so I could have my mom all to myself.
5. My mom died when I was 15. In the almost 12 years since she passed away, there hasn't been one day when I haven't thought about her, missed her and wished she were here. She was 37 when she died of cancer and for some reason I live my life thinking it's all going to be over at 37. In other words, I count backwards from 37 to determine how much time I have to get things accomplished. If I leave this world at the hands of a cruel disease when I'm 37, I can only hope that I'm half the mother she was.
6. I love books. I spend hours in Chapters and about 90% of the time I buy a book based on the cover. I know you're not supposed to do that, but some of the most incredible stories I've read have been because the cover caught my eye and the sleeve captured my attention. Summer Sisters by Judy Blume, It's Called a Break-up Because it's Broken, Lipstick Jungle, Bergdorf Blondes and Chasing Harry Winston are only a few of the books I've fallen in love with just because the cover was cute and/or I liked the title. You should always take a chance on a book. Even if it's not great, you're still spending time exercising your brain while you read it waiting for the good parts.
7. During the height of her fame (pre-Federline, pre-meltdown, pre-crazy Southern gal), I was convinced that if I met Britney Spears, she would be my friend. I'm pulling for that girl all the way and even when she shaved her head and I thought she was totally effed up, I still wanted her to bounce back. I'll be seeing her in concert for the third time next month. Yes, I love her and her music. Say what you will about me. I also love Foo Fighters, The Ink Spots, Patsy Cline and The Airborne Toxic Event. My musical tastes vary and I make no apologies for what I like. So spare me the "Britney doesn't even sing...blah, blah." That girl can shake her ass and sell a record, so just shut up already.
8. I love Starbucks and I love coffee. I love that my drink of choice costs me over five bucks a day and that even when I'm broke and could get a coffee from home, walking into my favourite coffee place totally makes me happy. I spend $5.20 on a venti, lactose-free latte at least once a day and I'll never be a Tim Hortons drinker. If I have to drink Tims, I'll feel like I'm slumming it. The first coffee I had and loved was from the McDonalds drive-thru the morning my mom died. I've been a devoted follower of the java since then.
9. I am best friends with my ex. He's the first person I go to when I'm freaking out, need advice, need cheering up or just wanna talk. People think it's weird that we can be so close, but it makes perfect sense to us. We needed to end our romantic relationship to reap the benefits of being friends. We get along so much better now. You probably think I'm lying and that I'm still in love with him - you're wrong. I still love him, but now he's like a brother or cousin or uncle. I trust him completely and it's been years since we broke up.
10. I have three dogs and I adore them, but they're nuts. Trying to walk them takes all my energy and every time the doorbell rings it's mayhem at my house. These three mutts are outta control, but they're a part of my family. When it's time for me to get married and live with my new husband, the option of whether or not I'm bring Gigi with me isn't an option. If a guy can't accept my dog, then he doesn't love everything about me.
11. Last month I cut all my hair off and I regret it. I love the style, but miss my long hair :( My cousin told me I have to grow it out for her wedding. I wish I could go back a few months and dye my hair a different colour instead of chopping it off gradually because I was bored. It will grow back, I'm just impatient.
12. I would throw myself in front of a speeding train if it meant saving my family. I react without thinking. When I see a car accident, a stray dog or a child who looks like they're lost, I step in before I even realize what I'm doing. I just do and worry about the details later. If someone said to me, "You can save your sisters if you jump off this cliff" I wouldn't hesitate. Life without them wouldn't be worth living anyways.
13. My cousin Jen knows me better than anyone else. She knows when I'm keeping something from her, when I'm upset about something, when I'm angry and when I'm thrilled. We're only four months apart and we've grown up as best friends/cousins/sisters. We used to give each other beatings like you wouldn't believe. She would bite me and I would pull her hair. She always cried first and then I'd feel bad and try to smooth it over before she told on me. If we got into a scrap today, she'd kick my ass. Next summer she's getting married and I'm her maid of honour.
14. I don't regret the failures in life. I'd rather try something and fail miserably then sit back thinking I'd screw it up if I tried. I have no shame about that stuff. I don't ever want to look back on my life and think, "I wonder what would have happened IF..."
15. I want to live on the beach at some point in my life. I'm a water sign and nothing soothes me more than the sound of waves lapping against the shore. Walking along a sandy beach make me so happy. I feel more alive when I'm near water and I take a bath almost every day. Even if I only spend ten minutes in the tub, I still feel better than when I got in.
16. I'm a hopeless romantic. I want the whole deal and nothing less. I want fireworks, butterflies, laughter, passion, friendship, love, chemistry and lots more. I love getting flowers. I love receiving cards. I adore a kiss on the forehead, a squeeze of my hand, a hug so tight it takes my breath away and the kind of kiss that makes you smile afterwards just thinking about it.
17. When I was a little girl, I loved the song "Puttin' on the Ritz." I still do and I haven't heard it in years. I wanted to do a tap dance to the song when I was 5.
18. I believe in ghosts and I'm terrified of them.
19. I always wanted to surf and on my first day, I bailed huge and gave up. It was pathetic, but when that board hit me in the face it HURT! I will try again though. Perhaps in more calm waters, with an instructor and a helmet :)
20. I love gardening. During the summer, I wake up and can't wait to get outside and water my plants and flowers. I don't know much about proper gardening, I just buy what I like and hope I can keep it alive. Dark, rich soil and lush grass are so gorgeous. I have a bag of gardening tools and my gloves are tan leather with fuchsia accents. They're great.
21. I often know when things will happen before they actually do. I'm not psychic, I just get feelings about stuff. It's usually nothing big. I can sometimes tell when somebody will call me or what a friend is going to tell me. I knew my grandmother had died before my aunt told me. I knew right away that I was going to break somebody's heart. I knew my mother was dying of cancer before the doctors told us.
22. The first movie I ever owned was a VHS copy of Cinderella. My cousins Dawn and Laura and their parents gave it to me for Christmas. I felt so grown up having my own movie. I still have it.
23. My first Cabbage Patch doll is named Patch. She has brown yarn pigtails, a yellow dress with a duck on it, hot pink Crayola lipstick I drew on her and the thread sewn to her foot to make toes is missing. She is in my basement packed away and sometimes when I'm down there looking for something, I still pick her up and hug her. When I got blood work done before I had my tonsils out when I was six, I squeezed Patch so hard that her plastic head hurt my cheek. My Aunt Dolly told me last year that her name wasn't actually Patch and that I just wanted to call her that. I really want to know what her name was supposed to be.
24. I still know every word to Clueless, Dumb and Dumber, When Harry Met Sally and Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead.
25. Every December, when Charlie Brown's Christmas is aired for the first time that season, I watch it and cry almost immediately. My mom loved Charlie Brown and I think of her and sob because I miss her so much when I watch it. My sisters, Dad and I try to buy all the Charlie Brown decorations we can find because we think she would have done that. Seeing the skating rink, those fluffy snowflakes and hearing the start of that song goes makes me fall apart.